Lucy & Chuck - A Refined Pair Seeking a Home Worthy of Their Standards
Greetings, commoners. We are Lucy and Chuck, a bonded pair of felines with discerning tastes, impeccable manners, and a deep appreciation for the finer things in life-sunlight, silence, and an elegant scattering of Temptations treats. Our previous staff-er, owner-regretfully surrendered us due to a move. Tragic. But, as they say, one human's lapse in judgment is another's golden opportunity. Let's get this straight:
Lucy is grace personified. Dignified. Serene. She prefers a tidy litter box, classical music during mealtimes, and uninterrupted window-gazing sessions. If your furniture doesn't match, she will notice.
Chuck is charming in a slightly unpolished way. He fancies himself a poet. He enjoys galloping down hallways at 3 a.m., philosophizing about birds through the window, and being spooned during naps.
We are inseparable. Like velvet and pearls. Like red wine and judgment. We groom each other daily, coordinate our naps, and play with deliberate grace. Separating us would be an absolute scandal. We're seeking: A quiet home with an appreciation for velvet throws and tasteful decor. Humans who will cater to our needs without smothering us in plebeian affection (we'll let you know when it's cuddle o'clock). A lifestyle of leisure, art, and occasional zoomies.
In return, we offer:
Company that never talks over your podcasts
Daily doses of aesthetic perfection
Side-eye sharp enough to slice a carrot
If you believe your home is worthy of hosting us, please contact our servants.
Lucy & Chuck
(Currently interviewing peasants at WECHS)
Cublicle 16B
References available upon request (we once made a vet cry from our elegance)
